October 2010
1 post
One of these things is not like the other.
In 2007, I started this blog to use as a sounding board for all of the things I couldn’t say out loud. At the time, I was just beginning a three-month-long celibacy vision quest. And, as a result, I was quite literally going out of my mind. At 20, when I began this, I had already racked up too many awkward sexual moments to deal with on my own. So, I decided to blog about them. After about...
December 2007
1 post
an affair to remember.
It’s snowing outside. The first real snow this winter. And where am I? At Starbucks. Why? Because I’ve been kicked out of my own goddamned house. Forced to brave the icy roads, so someone can get their swerve on. A swerve which has been denied over and over again. But, I’m not stupid. Every time that bitch comes over, The Palace REEKS of swerve. Nasty. Bitches everywhere,...
November 2007
5 posts
damn.
Motherfucker is MARRIED. Pssshhhh.
S.A.D. and other reasons why the holidays suck.
I like being single. I do. I can sleep in as late as I want— alone, taking up the whole bed and wearing granny panties and a raggedy New York Dolls t-shirt. The pressure to be “on” 24/7 is gone. I can go days with no make-up, and who cares if my hair looks like a rat’s nest? Not me. No late-night phone calls. “Talk dirty to me baby.” Ha, yeah right. The Office...
Factoid of The Day
Did you know?… Ithyphallophobia is a morbid fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis. I only have one of those symptoms. Mostly just because that would be awkward. Although, the more that I think about it— having an erect penis for a day would be kind of fun. First, I would probably jack off a lot— at least for the first half of the day. Then, I would try to find...
i am way overqualified for that...
Day 14:
It’s 2:24. I have been awake for about an hour now. And I just realized that I have replaced sex and late-night phone calls with sleep. I’m not sure if that’s a complaint or not. Sometimes it’s hard to be on the same page with yourself. Anyway, I’ve been going to sleep around 11;30 or 12 every night and waking up some time in the mid-afternoon. Either I have...
meat is murder.
Day 6: I’m currently wondering why I’ve chosen to begin this experiment. Maybe after all the failed relationships and disappointing one-night-stands, I’m tired. Tired of all the “musicians” and “artists.” More like, narcissists. No, thanks. I need this though. My body needs this. A rest. Especially, because I’ve begun to feel like an addict....