Day 14:

It’s 2:24. I have been awake for about an hour now. And I just realized that I have replaced sex and late-night phone calls with sleep. I’m not sure if that’s a complaint or not. Sometimes it’s hard to be on the same page with yourself. Anyway, I’ve been going to sleep around 11;30 or 12 every night and waking up some time in the mid-afternoon. Either I have a sleeping disorder or way too much free time on my hands now. It’s funny how much time we waste with relationships and communication— or lackthereof.

Anyway.

“Hello?”
“Hey, are you awake?”
“I am now, thanks.”
“So, what’s up?”
“Nothing, just woke up.”
“Awesome. Hey, I have a proposal for you.”
“Shit. What now?”
“Well, I’ve decided to hire you as my personal historian. I figure, you know, so much crazy shit is always happening that I should be documenting it. So, I’m going to pay you $100 a week to follow me around with a tape recorder and to stalk my friends and family.”
“Wait. :long pause: Really? That’s what you came up with? Are you high?”
“No, I’m serious it’s a good idea. We’re going to make so much money. Or you will anyway when you sell the book.”
“Wait. So you want me to write a book, too? Really?”
“Yeah, but I want like half. I figure it’s my life, so I deserve half.”
“You are officially completely insane. But, I’m in. I listen to you talk about yourself all day anyway, might as well get paid for it.”
“Exactly my point.”
“Well, awesome. And now, I’m hanging up.”

::

We’ll call him #3 or the juvenile delinquent. What is it with me and the gays? They love me. Literally. We met many, many summers ago. “Hullo, love.” He had many levels of intoxication— British Accent was Level 4. He was sexy in that, I’m Never Going to Have Him way. But, I did have him— while his boyfriend was on vacation. Over and over again. It lasted all summer. After awhile, the bad boy act wore off. The whispers of our friends became too much. The run-ins with the law put me over the edge.

He was a mixed-up kid. But, I’ll never forget that summer. His ex will never let me forget it either.